Even as I start this post, I question how vulnerable I want to be. 

During this quarantine, I’m pretty sure I had at least 2 nervous breakdowns. 

As the world was at a standstill, I felt like I couldn’t breakdown in peace. There felt like no time to mourn through anything.

Bills still needed to be paid and capitalism continued to rule over any serenity I had planned.

Whilst I don’t feel I have the heart to go into the ins and outs of what’s going on with me, I do want to offer some self-care tips that have really helped. I hope they help you too.

  1. Set boundaries like no other.

    If I don’t want to do it, the answer is no. Look people square in the eye and let them know that no is a full sentence. If someone calls me out of the blue? I don’t pick up unless I feel like it. Choose yourself first every single time.

  2. Don’t force it.

    Back in the day, I wanted to keep friendships so badly that I forgot to be a friend to myself first. Anyone who wants to leave can now find the door. 

  3. Speak up and don’t conform.

    People always want to box us in as humans. Never in my life have I got so many suggestions about what I should and shouldn’t do. People forget that my name is Bola Sol and the Sol is a quadruple entendre. One of the meanings is that I’m willing to walk alone, solo. This one life is mine so let me have it. When people get too familiar, I speak up, let them know I’m uncomfortable and adjust accordingly. Miss me with this Susie Homemaker niceness that women do.  Matthew 5:37

  4. Take random days off.

    Remember that we are human beings, not human doings.
    Give yourself the privilege to chill. 

  5. Spend some change.

    Listen, I get that during quarantine we may all have saved some money but every now and again, one likes some new shoes or clothes or a brunch! Enjoy your hard-earned coins from time to time. If quarantine has taught me anything, it’s that tomorrow isn’t promised. Live for today, prepare for tomorrow.

This is a really short post but I missed writing and this website is my safe space.

Thank you for reading, you could have been anywhere else mentally but you chose this post.

God bless you always.