“When Will You Marry?”

A question aunties love to ask.

“You’re next.”

A statement people with newborn babies love to say.

Disclaimer: Marriage is wonderful, children make the world a better place and keep the world turning but now is not my time for that life and I’m more than okay with that. Old school society standards are not what I live by, it’s a new age and sisters are doing it for themselves

I don’t know about you but I still feel like a young spring chicken that is grabbing life by the balls. And as great as it is to see people my age getting married and having babies – this is not my primary concern and I won’t apologise for not making it my main priority right now.

What is it with this stigma that women are always looking for someone else? God forbid we are looking for ourselves first! I sat in a room full of women recently and most of the discussion time was centred around relationships with others. After a certain point, all I could think was ‘What about relationships with ourselves?’ As women, we are usually the ones talking about relationships. We are so sacrificial and so willing to create love but we must be equipped to love the person in the mirror first.

And although some of the things I’m going to talk about below can be done in marriage and with children, it’s a lot easier without responsibility.

Right now you are in one of the greatest times of your life. I’m going to say that again. Right now you are in one of the greatest times of your life. It may not seem like it when there are constant ups and downs and you don’t know which answer is the right one for you. However in our young years, in particular, we must live audaciously. These are the times when you can:

  • Live abroad (then come back home knowing you’ve got a place to stay)
  • Start a business (knowing you can make mistakes & jump back up again)
  • Travel excessively (by yourself and with others)
  • Take risks (whatever that means to you)

We aren’t in school anymore and we don’t have to follow a uniform type of routine. My point is to go after what you want. So you thought you wanted to do one thing and you changed your mind. So what? Everyone is in a stable job and you are starting your own business? So what?

Being scared is not enough of a reason to put your dreams on hold. It’s always heartbreaking to hear someone that has a dream and they are letting the desire dwindle. Now is the time to take the risk on yourself, you are totally worth it. The reason to go now instead of 5/10 years from is that you have less on your plate. Fewer children, fewer mortgages, fewer bills. That is waiting for all of us and how it is packaged is dependent on what we make of NOW. Don’t waste this energy. Don’t waste the feeling of your youth. Wake up to yourself and go after the things you want. Realise as often as you can that there is power in your youth. There is power in right now.